Going Amish

In a couple of my other posts I’ve touched on how I’ve been blessed with the curse of bipolar II and how much it absolutely sucks. I usually stay somewhere between the realms of melancholy and normal, although anxiety likes to stick around. Occassionally I shift into a stage of hypomania which starts out as a time of unprecedented alertness and productivity before getting out of hand and bringing with it bad decisions in the self-medicating department and its unintended consequences, pressured speech, agitation and relentless anxiety before flaming out and crashing back down into melancholy after its run its course.

It happens to be one of the most lethal of mental conditions, possibly more lethal than major unipolar depression and even bipolar I, with a suicide rate estimated up to 20%. This doesn’t surprise me at all because opting out sounds very appealing when times get tough and I just want to surrender. Only a few people close to me even know I have bipolar II, and I’m pretty sure none of them even appreciate what that even entails besides the stereotypes that pop to mind. I’ve struggled with finding balance and inner peace and to keep it short I’m going to make a committment to myself and my family to move past the ups and downs because quite frankly I can’t deal with them anymore and refuse to go through life like this. I’m also tired of being fat and having man boobs.

The quest I am undertaking is the immediate cessation of poisoning my body with all refined sugar products, alcohol, tobacco and caffeine for one month. This will be coupled with my best efforts to also improve my sleep and exercise habits. I believe that diet, exercise, sleep and mood are all so interrelated to one another that maybe instead of just simply taking meds I am going to take matters into my own hands like I’ve done throughout my entire life when I’ve wanted to accomplish something. I also watched a program tonight on Nat Geo on the Amish and I have nothing but admiration and respect for their commitment to the respect of their bodies, minds and families, even though I’m atheist and about as far ideologically from them as you could probably be otherwise. I’ll let you know how it all shakes down.

~ by vann1912 on 19 November, 2011.

2 Responses to “Going Amish”

  1. emma stone
    Hey there! This is my first comment here so I just wanted to give a quick shout out and tell you I genuinely enjoy reading your posts. Can you suggest any other blogs/websites/forums that cover the same topics? Thank you so much!

  2. Thanks for reading! Here are three of my favorites:

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